Hi OTM, I’m 18 and am a single mother. I’ve always had big dreams of college and buying a home. Now my dreams seem crushed. I work at the gas station two blocks from home to make some money , I live at home with my parents and feel like a loser. I had to drop out of highschool and I have no money, no car and no spirit. My hopes and dreams have diminished. My family has always struggled to makes ends meet but I thought I’d do better for myself but here I am falling into what I should of expected. A life of poverty. I want to do much more for my son but I think this is it, I have no help to do better. Do you think I will ever have my chance at a good life for my son and I? Is there anyway to push myself to do better and get myself out of this poor life? I don’t even have money for college either. I have no money to spare . It seems hopeless.

Dear Jody,

You writing me was a huge step. Honey, I know it seems hopeless but believe me it is not. You can and will have everything you want IF you really want it and are willing to work for it. Let’s start with your GED. Get your GED. Then go on-line and start looking up state and federal government programs for single mothers.
Jody, my ex-husband left me with 4 children under the age of 9 yrs old. I had NOTHING and had to move back in with my folks WITH 4 children. It was very tight and very tough. My parents were struggling, my father had cancer and was disabled and my mother had to work to support them. So my being there with my 4 little kids added to their burden. I decided I wanted more for myself and my children.
I secured a waitress job so the tips would be in cash and worked very hard at night while the kids slept.
Next I went to state offices (this was before the internet) and looked up help for single mothers. I found a government program that helped my buy a house with no money down and no interest. I put a roof over my children’s heads, all by myself. It was hard but I read a lot, spoke to a lot of people and looked for new job opportunities. By talking to people I learned as much as I could about what I wanted to do with my life. One job led to another and each new job was a better opportunity with better pay.
Eventually I started my own company.
Baby, I am just one of so many women I know who have done the same thing. I refused to be knocked down and every time I was I’d fight harder. You can do this, do you hear me? YOU can do this. You must talk to people, ask questions and do the research. There is help out there and you must go get it. Do it for yourself and your baby boy. Dreams are not ever impossible, you just have to really want them enough and work very hard on making them happen.
Jody, your first step was writing me, a one time single mother raising 4 children all on her own. That is why my children, yes my children named me, One Tough Muther. If I could do it so can you. Take a deep breath and say, this is only temporary I will make this better. Please write me again and tell me how you are doing. I am here for you but YOU are the only one who can make it happen.

Good Luck & Huge Muther Hugs,

One Tough Muther

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