So here I am this average mom thinking I’m doing an awesome job holding a full time job and being a full time mommy ..Kids are fed, bathed, happy.. The basic things.. Then I meet mrs cleaver. Miss white picket fence, Pinterest mom who makes her kids halloween costumes every year and makes home made cupcakes every weekend and has THEMED birthday parties with all hand crafted birthday decorations.. It’s very annoying to me.. I get it , you like volunteering in the kids classroom and on field trips. You love hosting extravagant birthday parties.. I don’t. I love that the kids have school and I get that space from my kids. Yes I’ll host a birthday party but it’ll be a few hours long and with whatever decorations I decide to throw together to make it nice for my kids. Is there something wrong with me not wanting to compete with other moms, I don’t want to be perfect, I want happy healthy kids and I’ll do what I can to make that happen but I’m no creative mrs cleaver. I’m to tired for that. Should I try harder to be the mom of 2015 -the crafty mom?
Dear Not the Perfect Mom,
Welcome to the club! You are in the 99% club of us who do what we can, as much as we can, when we can, love our children, want them happy but also have a life. NtPM, you state your kids are fed, bathed and happy, the basics you say. Well Doll, that is not the basics in a lot of children’s lives. So be proud of what you do. I too always felt like the Mom that was always a few steps behind June Clever and Shirley Partridge. I was the “working” Mom who never got to be the room Mother and missed volunteering as school trip aid.
But when I was home I was home.
We played catch, went on hikes, went swimming, ice skating and spent time together. I always made family dinners and we sat at the table and discussed our day. We played games, colored, read and spent time as a family as much as we could before bedtime. We always worked on projects together and laughed a ton. I realize now it was not as much about the quantity of time we were together, it was all about the quality. The quality of time we were interacting not me doing. We still go on family vacations once a year, spend holidays together and love having summer picnics. Funny thing is my kids are all grown with families of their own but love to get together.
NtPM, take it from me your kids will not be damaged from packaged coolies, throw together themes or bakery cupcakes.
What they will be damaged from is the pressure you put on yourself to accomplish all the crafts and the time it takes you away from them to do them.
Hey Not the Perfect Mom, I have an idea. If you want to try harder at anything in 2015, try harder at cutting yourself a break, you deserve it.
Huge Muther Hugs,
One Tough Muther