Dear One tough Muther,

My name is Tina and I am your typical Mother. I have three girls who have always been very involved in their school and helping out in the community and very respectful- Let me brag- Perfect Girls!! Recently my middle daughter has been dressing in all black sort of goth clothing. Wearing gauges in her ears, dark makeup, Piercings. She has also picked up an attitude. Well of course the other mothers in our area had to put their two sense in and told me to nip it, to straighten her out. That she wasn’t raised to be this way. I on the other hand am taking it as it is my daughter expressing herself. She isnt doing anything wrong. She is still very wholesome and attends church with the family and I know where she is all times. I may look like I would worry about how people look at me but I am all for my children finding themselves and maybe going through a stage- I am hoping this is.BUT, Are the other parents right though, is allowing my daughter to dress this way encouraging her that this is ok? Maybe this stage will never end because of ME allowing it? Here I go second guessing.

Dear Tina,

You are 100% right, children do go through many stages and need to find their own voice. I don’t see anything wrong with allowing her to dress the way she chooses, providing it is decent, respectful and she maintains her current attitude and personality.
But Tina please do one thing, sit her down and talk to her, not at her. Explain to her that you are trying to respect her individuality, support her when others may not and tell her that you are always there for her.
Tina, as far as this stage never ending goes, well I highly doubt this will go on forever. I think the fact that she feels comfortable expressing her individuality is a compliment to you as a mother.
Forget what others tell you to do and go with what you know in your heart, she is a good girl and as long as she stays that way, that’s what important.

Good Luck & Huge Muther Hugs,

OTM (One Tough Muther)

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