OTM I’ve been divorced 10 years and it’s been hard for me to open my heart back up after such a terrible divorce. I finally met Fredrick and we quickly fell in love. He is 12 years younger than I. It makes no difference to us. How do I introduce him to my children. My kids are going to think I’m nuts. I am 55 and Fredrick is 43. I’m new to this new love but do you think others will think I’m crazy . Am I over thinking this maybe? Should I care what people think ?

Dear Jen,

Are you happy? Does he treat you well? Do you have a lot in common? Is he kind? Considerate? Supportive? Funny? and do you feel special when your with him?
If you answered YES to all of those questions, case closed.
Jen, you are an seasoned adult and so is Fredrick. Your boyfriend is not a teenager and the BOTH of you have certainly had had enough life experience to know the traits each of you are looking for in a relationship. You owe NO one an explanation of any kind. Everyone should be happy and supportive that after 10 years you have found someone. The only concern anyone should have is, if you are happy.
As for your children, all I can say is they do not have the right to “judge” Fredrick’s sincerity and commitment solely based on his age. Unless your children witness something disrespectful and disturbing with Fredrick or any man for that matter, they should not have any issues.
Jen, I do think you are over thinking this. You are allowing the age gap and society’s perception of the appropriate relationship, older man/younger woman to fog up what truly matters, your happiness. It may take sometime but put that societal standard behind you and enjoy your new found love. Life is too short to worry about things that are not worth space in your mind. Be happy and do not allow anyone to push their “normal” relationship standards on you.
I’m very happy for you, best of luck!

Huge Muther Hugs,

One Tough Muther

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