Dear OTM,

I am a 46 year old mother of two that is very recently divorced. My husband and I were married for 25 years and one day he just sprung out of the blue that he wanted a new life. It was gut wrenching and has been the hardest most trying time of my life with continuing being a mother and functioning member of society while I am ripped apart internally. After a year I have started to mend, but I feel as if I lost 25 years of my life. How can I make up for lost time and learn to live for me again?

Dear Kimberly,

I am so sorry, I know how hard it is to start over again. I always say, one of the only things you can definitely count on in life is, change.
Kimberly, you didn’t lose 25 years of your life, that life has now changed. The previous chapter is over and a new chapter is starting. Before today you probably concentrated on raising your family and doing what was best for them, now it’s time to think about what would be best for you too. You don’t mention the ages of your children but maybe now you have the time to try something that you have always wanted to try. Like take a class, join yoga, dance or a club. Learn photography, writing or go skydiving. Try something you’ve always dreamt of trying or maybe just spend more time to reading or painting. This is your chance to rediscover yourself, so you must get out there and try new and different things. Meet new people, make new friends but allow time everyday for “ME” time. I think a lot of time women lose their identity when we have spent so much of their lives concentrating on being a wife and a mother, so we forget how to be US.
Kimberly, you are still young and have plenty of options. Remember that nothing is going to work, unless you want it to.
I’m sure you were torn apart and for that I am sorry however the healing process has started so help it along by giving yourself something new and exciting to look forward to.
Life’s too short to be unhappy. Live your life to the fullest, discover and embrace the new you and build the next chapter with Kimberly in mind.

Huge Muther Hugs,

One Tough Muther

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