My daughter is 17 years old and is engaged to her boyfriend of just two years. My daughters boyfriend approached my ex husband about the proposal, seeking acceptance in which my ex granted without my knowledge. My daughter will be 18 in three months, but she is just a kid with her whole life before her. They’ve settled my nerves my agreeing to remain engaged and to not rush into a marriage but I know that really doesn’t mean they will hold that promise. I really need to stop this engagement and I need your help because I’m planning on setting her boyfriend up to look bad as to have my daughter leave him. What other options do I have?

Dear Mom,

Have you lost your mind? DO NOT set your daughters boyfriend up to break up there engagement.
That is nothing more than deceitful, underhanded and wrong.
I completely understand your concerns and would also be very upset if this were my daughter but setting the boyfriend up is not the answer.
Have you tried sitting down with your daughter, the boyfriend and his parents to discuss this openly and honestly?
Have you asked you daughter what her future plans are as far as schooling and or a job? What her aspirations are in the future? Does she or he plan on going to college, trade school or do anything to build a career?
How they plan to move forward in the future to build a life?
Strongly opposing this engagement may only push them closer together, especially since your daughter’s father gave them his blessing. What I would do is appeal to them calmly. Tell them your concerns and explain to them that there is certainly no rush to get married. Tell them that you will respect the engagement and support their decision to marry if they both agree to take it slow and build a future before they get married.
Unfortunately Mom, this is the best I can do. I am not going to say it will stop them from getting married but I am going to say, talking it out is better than setting someone up. Karma has a way of settling the score and by trying to set the boyfriend up, you may just be setting yourself up for a real fall.

Good Luck & Huge Muther Hugs,

One Tough Muther

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