One of my goals in life is to break this reoccurring cycle of becoming parents young. My inlaws became parents at 17, my (now husband) and I became parents at 20&23 only after dating a few months. I want to drill in my kids heads that it is absolutely unacceptable for their fates to repeat in that manner. I talk a lot of how important college is and learning and marriage then kids. So it’s natural for my little elementary kids to talk about college, (which I never remember talking about even as a highschool student). My kids are all under 10 , so I may be nuts but I’m honestly stressing about it. I was just informed by a highschool student that in the school systems in our area , that the class sizes are dropping because girls get pregnant and do not return to school. How can I control them & make sure they know that becoming a young parent is nothing good.

Dear Mindy,

You are doing a fabulous job by talking to your children, so keep talking. I became a Mom at 20 yrs old and missed out on the whole college experience. My parents never spoke of college to me and when I bought it up I was told I couldn’t go there wasn’t any money. I desperately wanted to move from our tiny town and go to college so I married a young man who joined the Army and said I could go once we married.
So once we moved to our first duty station, I started college but almost immediately I got pregnant. Not once, not twice, not three times but four so college wasn’t in my future any more.
Then we divorced and I ended up struggling to raise 4 little children on my own. So I spent my children’s entire school years, talking to them and preparing them for college. I told them that there was 16 years of school and that college was a must. I helped them be active in school, sports and events and did what ever I could to teach them to better themselves. We talked openly and often about college and their dreams for the future even when they were little. I would tell them they could be anything, ANYTHING they wanted all they had to do is really want it enough, to work for it.
Well, I am very, very blessed and proud to say all 4 of my children have gone to college. My oldest son is continuing his education and is more then halfway through to his doctorate degree, my second son is a police officer, my third son in the Vice Principle of a high school and my daughter has a degree in biology and she and her husband have a beautiful new baby both are 27 years old.
So Mindy keep talking to your children your doing the right thing. Talk don’t lecture and allow them to talk too. help them through school and talk to them about everything, not just school as the grow up. Because soon they will be grown and it will end up that the little voice they hear in the back of their heads will be yours, helping them make good decisions.

Good Luck & Huge Muther Hugs,

One Tough Muther

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